After tapping into her kinky side, one woman found herself in a dominant/ submissive relationship with a friend. The only thing that all these different forms of relationship have in common is right there there in the name: someone is Dominant and someone is submissive. In a Dominant/submissive, aka Dom/sub or simply D/s, relationship, the power dynamic between the participants is the kink. Essentially, the.
Some employ a written form known as a "Dungeon negotiation form", for others a simple verbal commitment is sufficient. Consent can be limited both in duration and content. Consensual non-consensuality is a mutual agreement to act as if consent has been waived within safe, sane limits. It is an agreement that consent is given in advance, sometimes without foreknowledge of the exact actions planned, though within defined limits subject to a safeword, reasonable care, common sense, or other restrictions.
Rules For A Dominant-Submissive Relationship
The consent is given with the intent of its being irrevocable under normal circumstances. As such, it is a show of extreme trust and understanding and is usually undertaken only by partners who know each other well, or otherwise agree to set clear, safe limits on their activities. It's not unusual to grant consent only for an hour or for an evening. When a scene lasts for more than a few hours, it's common to draft a "scene contract" that defines what will happen and who is responsible for what.
It's a good way to work out what all the parties want, and usually improves the experience. Some contracts can become quite detailed and run for many pages, especially if a scene is to last a weekend or more. For long term consent, a "slave contract" may be drawn up. BDSM "contracts" are only an agreement between consenting people and are usually not legally binding; in fact, the possession of one may be considered illegal in some areas.
Some ceremonies become quite elaborate, and can be as involved as a wedding or any similar ritual. Equipment and accessories[ edit ] This section does not cite any sources.
Please help improve this section by adding citations to reliable sources. March Learn how and when to remove this template message Some people maintain a special room or area, called a dungeonwhich contains special equipment shackleshandcuffswhipsqueening stoolsand spanking benches or a Berkley horsefor example used for play scenes, or they may visit a BDSM club that maintains such facilities.
They are not easily spotted, because as I said before, many men love to be adored and worshipped in this way but some of them love it just a bit more. Takes control over everything 2. Expects to be pleased 3. Demands obedience Traits and roles of the submissive While the dominant is all about being in control, the submissive loves to be controlled and loves to please their partner in every way possible. They are not a slave, their desire is simply to please their partner. The traits and roles of the submissive include: Accepting to be controlled 3.
Rules & Definition Of A Dominant Submissive Relationship
Putting the needs of their partner above everything else 4. Showing the desire to please the dominant 10 rules in a dominant-submissive relationship As mentioned previously, this is a specific type of relationship in which rules have to be established in order for everything to work properly and so that every side of the relationship gets what they need in order to be happy. Just to be clear, there are no hard rules, because these rules are created by the principles of both sides of the relationship so that both know what to comply with, what to avoid and how to enforce the rules.
If you want to engage in this type of relationship without having had any experience before, then be careful and open-minded to all the rules that are about to come about in order to get the most out of it.
Open-mindedness As mentioned before, having an open mind really is crucial in this type of relationship. In every relationship you have to be open-minded about the values and perspectives of your partner but more so in this one in particular.
It all depends on the experience you both have and on the willingness to learn from one another and to work together. This is a couple effort and you have to work together to make it pleasant. Also you have to be open-minded to try out new things that you might not have liked before. Maybe this time and the way he does it is actually different? Your partner wants to fall in love with your human side, too; the one who knows how to have mercy and the one who is willing to bend the rules and give lighter punishments.
Trust The only way to be trusted is to show trustworthiness first.
You have to show your partner that you can be trusted to respect the rules and not cross the line. Imagine if a grown man would hit you as hard as he could, just because you trusted him and you let him do it? You have to lower your expectations in order for them to fit the willingness of your partner. Just imagine if you came home from work with a friend and your wife was sitting on the floor in front of the door completely naked.
You are his partner, not a slave. Honest communication Communication is the key in this type of relationship as in every other. You have to talk about health, boundaries, sex needs and your previous experience of this type of relationship. If you refuse to talk about your wants and needs then the relationship is doomed to fail without a doubt.
If yes, invest in your communication and show your partner that they can be heard at any given time because you will dedicate the time and energy needed to meet their needs. Because of the fact that this type of relationship can get a bit dangerous in-between the sheets, make sure to have a safe word that your submissive will say so you know that they need to stop.
Rules & Definition Of A Dominant Submissive Relationship
Health The dominant-submissive relationship requires both partners to be mentally and physically healthy. This involves good sleeping habits, a minimum intake of alcohol, a nutritious diet and a stress-free lifestyle.
Enjoy Why are you doing all of this? To enjoy yourself, right? You both do it in order to have some fun and to enjoy your relationship on a whole new level. Start it as with every other usual relationship. Understand each other, communicate and be gentle. Have patience and your partner will thank you afterward.Inside BDSM & Dominant and Submissive Relationships
In order to create a comfortable atmosphere for the submissive to relax more, you have to be gentle and caring.