Relationships. Thursday, July 2, How to Stop Playing the 'Blame Game'. By Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD. couple arguing. Everyone makes mistakes – that's. In this follow up to her popular short on empathy, Dr. Brené Brown considers why we blame others, how it sabotages our relationships, and why. When we stop placing blame in our relationship, we shift our focus inward. We can take charge and start to differentiate from destructive.
Does the situation need to be withdrawn from?
What is the story you are telling yourself — or the meaning you are making — about what they other person did or said? Instead, when we stop to take responsibility for the story, we realize that what the other did or said may not actually equal our belief about it.
Taking Responsibility in Your Relationship
Regardless of what you discover from this inquiry, allow yourself to look at the whole situation through the lens of responsibility and creativity. It is also my experience that when we are in our heads we are cut off from our hearts, but that when we are in our hearts we can use our heads.
This article courtesy of Spirituality and Health.
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Stop Playing the Blame Game. Retrieved on December 30,from https: The support dynamic was imbalanced, and it showed in my low levels of self-confidence and need for my partner to be my only source of self-worth. When we communicated and I recognized that changing my behavior could make our relationship better, I took responsibility for working to change how we supported each other in the relationship. I was able to recognize the mutual importance of support, and this helped me grow in my relationship.
What are you looking for?
What Taking Responsibility Looks Like It is important to distinguish between taking and deflecting responsibility for both you and your partner. For you, taking responsibility looks like practicing self-awareness.
Another way is being able to apologize and accept that what you do affects your partner. For your partner, taking responsibility looks like having open communication with you about their feelings and being willing to admit they can grow from the hard parts of the relationship.
Accepting Misplaced Blame There is an extremely important difference between taking responsibility and accepting misplaced blame.LoopLane Relationships - Playing the Blame Game
The following ways to use the empowering action of taking responsibility is important for both you and your partner to use and practice in your relationship. And being self-aware means you acknowledge that what you say and do impacts your partner.
I should have asked you before I added mustard.
Getting defensive is a reaction. When you act on a situation, you can respond with clarity and awareness. You can practice acting on situations instead of reacting by taking deep breaths or counting to ten.
It can be hard to think from the other perspective, especially in the heat of the moment.